Sign Posts for the Weary Wild Soul

Oh, how good it feels to finally be doing my very best! I am so happy to say that this will be the second semester in a row that I have earned straight A’s. Halleluejah! To think, a year and a half ago I was only taking 11 units (I’m taking 15 now) and I got two F’s and a C.

Tonight I took my last final in English. After we were finished some of us went outside (in the cold!) to chat. While we were talking I was able to articulate, for the first time, why I did so poorly that first year of college.

I realized that I hated high school so much that I thought, mistakenly, that I hated school. My hatred for the social circus that is high school was projected onto academics as a whole. How wrong that thought was! Now that I’m getting back into school I am realizing just what a dork I am! I was looking forward to taking my English final and I enjoyed taking my final in Math as well. I enjoy being evaluated and getting a chance to shine.

But I wasn’t always like this. There was a time when I was even getting C’s in my favorite subject (English). A big turning points for me was when I was talking to my boyfriend’s mom, Debbie. I had been talking about school and telling her how I was having a hard time. She said, matter-of-factly, “Well I don’t see why you have a hard time. You’re smart. You should be able to do it in your sleep.” The way she said this was so simple. It was almost like I was talking to myself. Hello Katie, do you hear what she just said? Are you listening right now?

And I started thinking about all the students who work so hard to earn a B on a test, and I get a B without hardly trying. It is an insult to those people who are working so hard for you to sit there with your B, when they know you rarely come to class. It is an insult to God to not use the skills you have been blessed with. To not use your talents is a sin (which I recently learned originally meant: to miss the mark. I thought that was interesting).

Academics doesn’t come naturally to everyone. It doesn’t mean you’re stupid if you have to work at school. American academics are pretty one-sided really. To be successful in school you need a good memory, an ability to comprehend and focus on textbooks, and here’s the clencher: to communicate with your teachers. I think there are a lot of people who would do better in school if they looked at teachers as friends, people who want you to succeed. I had some hardships during high school and oftentimes all it took was letting the teacher know what I was going through and they were more than willing to work with me.

So if you’re reading this, and school isn’t your thing don’t get down. I bet you’re a better athlete than I am. Or maybe you rock at guitar. Or maybe you haven’t found what it is that you’re good at but you will, I promise.

A dear friend told me that my posts will generate better conversations if I stick to one topic, so though I am caffeinated and could probably right several more pages that would certainly ramble from one topic to another, I will stop here.
I didn’t post for the last little while because I was focusing on school, but hopefully I’ll be posting more regularly over the summer.

Love, peace and blessings to you all!
Katie